Road marked 2020 with arrow pointing forward with text overlay: The "Year of YOU" - Making Your Fibromyalgia Care Plan A Priority

The “Year of You” – Making Your Fibromyalgia Care Plan a Priority

“I’ve decided 2020 is going to be the year of Terri” I half-jokingly said to my husband. I was only partially joking because I was thinking about how much I needed to re-commit to myself and my self-care.

Although I’m doing well and my flares are fewer and less-severe in general, I haven’t been as proactive as I should be in taking care of myself. This is in part due to the fact that I commit to things and then am afraid to do the things I know will help in the long run. I’m afraid they’ll temporarily increase my pain and I won’t be able to keep some commitment I’ve made.

I’ve decided that this year, I have to do things differently. I want to concentrate on doing the things I know are going to help me, not only with my fibromyalgia symptoms, but my health in general.

That may mean saying “no” to some things I’ve always done. It may also mean doing some new things and saying “yes” to some new opportunities.

Things I’m Saying NO To:

Some of the things I’ll be saying NO to are:

  • Things that I don’t enjoy, but do because I feel I “should” do them. We probably all have those things that we do only because we feel they’re expected of us, or feel we “should” do. Sometimes those things are necessary; for instance, when we need to take care of a family member, etc., but sometimes, we have just gotten into the habit of doing them.
  • Anything that has the potential to keep me from doing the things I need to do for my health. I spend a lot of time saying, “I don’t want to do this right now because I have to do _____________ and if I have a flare, I might not be able to.” This year, I have to make my wellness a priority.
  • Feeling guilty because I need to give up some things. I’ve always been involved in community activities, whether in my church or other volunteer activities, and I’ve often felt guilty because I can’t do the things I used to do for others. As I mentioned in Letting Go of Guilt When You Live with Chronic Pain, we shouldn’t feel guilty for something we have no control over.

Things I’m Saying YES To:

  • Recommitting to my HOPE plan. Especially over the last couple of months, I’ve let this slide. It’s time to get back to a healthy diet, optimism, prayer and meditation, and exercise. These are the things that help me thrive in spite of the Fibro and improve my overall wellness.
  • Doing more things that I enjoy. Sometimes I spend so much time doing all the stuff I need to do that I forget to include some things I enjoy doing. Having some things that we enjoy doing can bring joy to our lives and improve our outlook.

These are just a few things I’m doing to ensure I can be as well as possible. Fibromyalgia is a chronic illness, and it’s most likely here to stay, but I can do things to lessen its impact on my life.

It’s important to me that I’m as well as possible in order to be there for my family and contribute in some way to my fellow human beings. Right now, the best way I can do that is to concentrate on myself and what I need to do to feel better, get stronger, and improve my overall health.

Are You Ready to Make This the Year of YOU?

Have you ever felt this way? Have you ever realized that things had to change if you were ever going to make long-term improvements? If so, why not join me and make this the “year of YOU.” So often, we put other people and obligations ahead of ourselves. That’s not a bad thing, but at some point, we have to realize that if we don’t take care of ourselves, we can’t take care of others.

I’m not suggesting that we become selfish, or that we shirk our responsibilities. What I am suggesting is that instead of relegating ourselves and our Fibromyalgia Care Plan to the bottom of our list, we make taking care of ourselves a priority.

What do you need to do to feel better and positively impact your health long-term?

What things will you say NO to this year? More importantly, what will you say YES to in order to make this the year of YOU? Please share!




  1. You said “tell me what you think.” I think you are caring and concerned about others and probably tend to put yourself last. I think you need to do what you just said, and others will benefit from a healthier Terri. It sounds like something our physical therapists would say, but I think you can do it. Here’s wishing you happiness and joy in the coming year! Thanks for sharing advice most of us should consider. – George

    1. Thank you so much for your kind words George! It’s so hard to focus on myself so much without feeling selfish, but I know it’s necessary. It’s like the old “oxygen mask” adage that we hear so often. We have to take care of ourselves first in order to be there for those we love. I hope you’re doing well – I’m trying to catch up with everyone, as I took a lot of time away at Christmas. Wishing you and Sandy a wonderful 2020!

  2. Oh…. well I realized this weekend that it didn’t take much of anything to throw my back out and induce a bad flare. I may have learned that doing sedentary things are not avoiding, but us my new way of life… I need to be ok with that. 😳😿

    1. Oh my goodness Ruth, I’m so sorry to hear about your back. I hope your flare subsides soon. I know what you mean about needing to learn that being more sedentary may be your new way of life…. Acceptance can be difficult, can’t it? Sending gentle hugs your way.

    1. Thanks so much Kim! I hope your new year is off to a fabulous start. I took too much time off and now I’m waayyy behind on everyone’s blogs. I hope to catch up with everyone this week. ❤️

  3. Hi Terri, I have a similar commitment to myself. My flairs are getting better and I want to make sure I partake in life while I can without over doing things which repeat the pain cycle. I wish you all the siccess in 2020. 🙂

  4. It’s the year of me as well! I actually started putting my goals for this year into practice in November and am already feeling the benefits of it. I’m physically and mentally in a much better place and have no intention on going backwards. Wishing you a wonderful year of you!

    1. I’m so glad to hear you’re joining us Marie! It’s so hard to make time for the things we need sometimes, but it’s so important. As you said, knowing others are working toward the same goal can be so encouraging. I hope the “Year of Marie” is off to a fabulous start dear friend!

  5. Out with the old and in with the new, getting a refund on all those ‘shoulds’ that we own! I love this, and I love the hope and optimism that you radiate, Terri  ♥

    1. Thank you so much Caz! You’re far too kind! I like the idea of “getting a refund on all those ‘shoulds’.” It’s easy to get so caught up in what we “should” do that we don’t take the time to make what we really need a priority. Sending hugs your way sweet friend!

    1. Thanks so much Liz! You’re right — it’s difficult to do what’s best for us sometimes, especially when it comes to having to say “no.” We do need to make taking care of ourselves a priority though. For me, I want to be able to say “yes” to family members who may need some help with things, and in order to do that I may have to say “no” to others. At this point I’m perfectly okay with that. Sending hugs!

  6. Terri, this post really hit home with me. I’ve needed to do a full-fledged re-commitment to self-care and especially eating healthy and exercising, even when others are put out by my intentions. I’ve had a somewhat half-hearted January but am now inspired to give February my all!
    Thank you
    My Best Friend Adeline

    1. Thanks so much for sharing Joan! I’m in the same place you are – my word for this year is renewal. I have to seriously recommit to my self-care plan, even if it means giving up some other things. Here’s wishing you a fabulous February!

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